Hey Arnold Wiki

So? How did you learn so much

about flying kites, Grandpa?

Well, when you get

as old as I am, Arnold

you'd eventually learn

to do everything.

Now, how the heck

do we get home?

I'm lost and confused.

We can go this way, Grandpa.

(GASPS)

No, Arnold,

I can't go that way.

Come on, it's a shortcut.

No, no, I can't.

Why not?

I can't tell you,

it's too haunting.

Oh, come on.

Walk faster, Shortman.

Come on, faster, faster.

Grandpa, what's going on?

It's just a shortcut.

(GASPS)

MAN: Is that Steely Phil?

(GASPS)

It must be...

What is this place, Grandpa?

Who are all these people?

(STAMMERING)

Chinese Checkers.

ALL: Steely Phil.

Are they talking

about you, Grandpa?

No, I don't

know any of these people.

They're confusing me

with someone else.

Now, let's go!

(LAUGHING)

Next victim.

(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

Robby Fisher.

Well, as I live and breathe

if it isn't Steely Phil.

I thought you

had passed on years ago.

In your face, Fisher.

I'm alive and kickin'.

Well, I can see

you appear to be alive

but kickin'...

(SMIRKING)

You're not actually thinkin'

of entering the tournament

this Saturday?

I'm retired, Fisher.

(LAUGHING)

Yes. Yes, I remember now,

Steely Phil.

I dispatched you

many, many years ago.

But, ah, well...

One can't live

in the past, can one?

Good day, Steely Phil.

(LAUGHING)

Yes. Yes.

I hate the way that guy talks.

Steely Phil?

Was that your nickname

or something?

Yes, a long time ago.

Are you comfortable, Arnold?

'Cause I feel a long flashback

coming on.

It was almost 40 years ago...

That time there were

three great

Chinese Checkers players

on the circuit.

Robby Fisher.

Boris Slasky.

And a kid by the name

of Steely Phil.

I had practiced

and studied the game

for 30 years.

Playin' on sidewalks,

and in back alleys.

Slowly honing my skills.

Finally, I was ready

for the big boys.

The City Chinese Checkers

Masters Tournament.

All the Chinese Checkers

masters were there.

Nimble Ned.

Bodacious Bob.

Boris Slasky.

And Robby Fisher.

I beat everyone

they threw at me.

I couldn't lose.

Finally, it's down

to two contestants.

Me and Robby Fisher.

Started slow.

Feeling each other out.

I jumped one of his marbles

but he jumped one of mine.

The battle raged on

for hours.

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

Finally, one move separated

us from the championship,

it was then I realized

I couldn't win.

He boxed me into a corner.

I made the only move

I could see.

He jumped me back

and won the City Championship.

(ALL CHEERING)

You lost, Grandpa?

Yes, Arnold, I lost.

My confidence was broken,

my dream was dashed.

The next day

I officially retired

from Chinese Checkers.

But that defeat

haunted me for 40 years.

I replayed the game

over and over in my head

trying to see

what I did wrong.

Did you ever figure it out?

Yes, I did.

Turned out I had another move,

only I didn't see it.

I was too worried

about winning.

If I had moved

my last marble back

instead of forward

I would have

stalemated Fisher

and it would have been a tie.

You and Fisher both

would have been the champions.

That's right.

Only I didn't see that move.

But now it has been 40 years,

and because it's been

eating me up inside

all this time

there's only one thing to do

so I can finally

get my revenge

on Robby Fisher.

Come on, Arnold.

Are you gonna enter

the tournament, Grandpa?

Nope. I'm gonna enter you

in the tournament on Saturday.

You'll defeat

that arrogant rat

and reclaim the family honor.

What? Me?

Grandpa, Robby Fisher's

the City Champion.

I can't beat him.

It would take a pro, somebody

with years of experience.

Somebody like you.

Oh, I can't compete

with Fisher,

I'm out of practice,

plus I'm old and I'm fat.

Grandpa, you are not fat.

Well, that's true,

but I'm old

and out of practice.

Chinese Checkers

is a game of marbles

and I already

lost most of mine.

Look, you said it yourself,

we've got a week left

to practice before

the tournament.

It was your dream to be

a Chinese Checkers Champion.

It was my dream, Arnold.

A long time ago.

I could help

you train, Grandpa.

We could work

really, really hard every day.

You can beat him,

I know you can.

I don't know, Shortman.

What if I lose?

I'll be humiliated again.

What if you win?

MAN: Name?

It's your dream, Grandpa.

You should never give up

on your dreams.

Name?

MAN: Name?

Steely Phil.

(PHIL GRUNTING)

Don't worry, Grandpa,

when we are done

you're gonna be in

championship form

and you're gonna beat

Robby Fisher.

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

(CRASHING)

(PANTING)

(PANTING)

(SIZZLING)

(BONES CRACKING)

(BELL DINGING)

(CLOCK CHIMING)

(SIGHS)

Hey, Arnold, wake up. Come on.

Grandpa, what is it?

It's three o'clock

in the morning.

I can't do it, Shortman.

I can't beat him.

Sure you can.

We've been training all week.

You're ready, Grandpa.

No, I'm not.

I'm just not good enough,

that's all.

I couldn't beat him

40 years ago

I can't beat him now.

Don't say that, Grandpa.

Sometimes I can't believe

the moves you make.

I know, it is uncanny.

But as good as I am

Robby Fisher

is ten times better.

Remember all the times

when I was in a contest

and you told me I could win?

Oh, sure. But I didn't really

believe you could win.

I just told you that stuff

on the off chance that

the other kids would blow it.

But you still

gave me confidence

and you believed in me.

That was really important

to me, Grandpa.

It was?

Yeah.

And now I have the chance

to do the same thing for you.

I believe in you

and I know you can do it.

You're not just saying that

on the off chance the other

guys would blow it, are you?

No, Grandpa,

I really believe in you.

So, what do you say?

All right, Shortman.

I'll do it.

I'll beat Robby Fisher.

Besides, if I lose I can

always change my name

and leave the country.

Uh, right, Grandpa.

(CHUCKLES)

That's right.

Wish me luck, Shortman.

You won't need it, Grandpa.

(CLOCK TICKING)

Let the tournament begin.

Next victim.

(APPLAUSE)

(APPLAUSE)

Next victim.

Next victim.

(APPLAUSE)

You're doing great, Grandpa.

(BELL DINGING)

Ladies and gentlemen,

we have arrived

at the final round

of the Masters Tournament.

The winner of this round

will be the All-City Champion.

Last year's champion

Robby Fisher,

the challenger Steely Phil.

(CROWD MURMURING)

Well, what a delicious

surprise. If it isn't

my old nemesis Steely Phil.

Dealing you another

humiliating defeat

will make my victory

in this tournament

all the sweeter.

In your face, Fisher.

I'm gonna kick your patoot.

Careful, Steely Phil.

I do believe

your false bravado is showing.

(LAUGHING)

(IMITATING FISHER)

Now, stop talking

and let's play Checkers.

(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

(CROWD MURMURING)

Well, I must say, you haven't

completely embarrassed

yourself, Steely Phil.

Uh, the night is young,

Fisher.

(CROWD GASPS)

(CHUCKLES)

Well, isn't that just perfect?

You've fallen

into the same trap

I caught you in 40 years ago.

The same exact play.

No! It's not.

It's completely different.

It's... Oh, poo,

it's the same, isn't it?

(LAUGHING)

You realize of course,

Steely Phil, that you

can't possibly beat me now.

There's only one move

on the board you can make.

Come come, Steely Phil,

make your losing move

so I can once again

take the trophy

and you can wallow in your

characteristic humiliation.

Well, you're right about

one thing, Fisher.

I can't beat you.

But there is one

other move I can make.

What are you talking about?

Uh-huh.

It's a stalemate, Fisher.

Well, that's...

That's impossible.

No, how did you?

(LAUGHING)

I didn't see

that move last time.

But now I'm 40 years older

and 40 years smarter.

Plus I got

my grandson behind me.

So, I guess,

we both are champion now.

But I've never shared

a trophy with anyone.

This is an outrage.

Final match

is officially a tie.

The new champions are...

No, no, don't say it.

...Robby Fisher

and Steely Phil.

(CRYING)

(ALL APPLAUDING)

(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC PLAYING)

You did it, Grandpa.

Well, thanks for believin'

in me, Shortman.

Sure thing, Steely Phil.

(STEELY CHUCKLES)